Why can’t I be happy?
Chocs and Lemons.
Daily heart-out
Third Wheel
*let’s start this post with bahasa “saya” “anda” (ceritanya mau kayak blognya kak Yana, yang kata temen gue bahasanya dewasa banget)
Sebagian temen-temen saya udah punya pasangan alias pacar. salah satu bahkan udah menikah. alhamdulillah, saya cukup akrab sama pacar-pacar temen saya ini (kecuali si satu ini yang udah nikah). Selain sering jadi tempat curhat, saya juga sering diajakin jalan. apalagi kalo malem minggu, ketika saya pulang kerja, tanpa malu-malu saya nyamperin mereka. suka nggak enak sih, jadinya gangguin orang pacaran..hehehe.
Gara-gara sering dicurhatin, saya kayak jadi hapal A to Z soal pacaran mereka. tanggal jadian, trus tempat favorit kalo makan, tempat jalan-jalan, baju favorit masing-masing, sampe penyebab berantem.
Kata Putry, dia milih cerita soal pacarannya ke saya karena saya yang pendengar yang baik. Saya berasumsi, mungkin saya dipilih karena saya terlalu lama single, ya.
Saya terakhir pacaran akhir kelas 3 SMA, beberapa saat sebelum masuk kuliah. selama ini, baru pacaran tiga kali, dan tiga-tiganya nggak ada yang lebih dari tiga bulan. Selama pacaran, saya orangnya cuek banget. beda kalo lagi pdkt, dimana saya gencar-gencarnya deketin. ketika udah jadian, rasanya kayak nggak ada yang perlu diperjuangin. jadi cuek aja, putus juga nggak sedih-sedih amat. mantan-mantan ini juga masih temenan baik sama saya sampe sekarang.
Kalau dihitung, sudah empat tahun saya single. antara kerasa nggak kerasa ya. selama empat tahun udah beberapa kali jatuh cinta, kandas, sakit hati, tapi kadang (kadang yaa) ngerasanya no big deal.
Hari ini, saya ingat tanggal jadian seorang teman. pas saya bilang ke dia, dia malah bilang kalau dia aja sebenarnya lupa. saya malah aneh, kenapa bisa lupa? apa justru saya yang aneh, karena tau semua tanggal jadian teman-teman saya?
Anyway, tiba-tiba saya merasa, kayaknya saya udah kelamaan single. saya terlalu sering jadi third wheel, gangguin orang pacaran.
Bukannya saya gak suka single ya. gak ada yang salah dengan single. apalagi saya punya banyak teman. mau belanja, mau pulang bareng, mau ngopi-ngopi, hal-hal yang biasanya dilakuin sama orang pacaran semuanya bisa dilakuin sama teman-teman. toh, persahabatan itu seperti pacaran tanpa seks dan ciuman kan?
apalagi, saya punya kerjaan yang cukup menyita waktu, 6 days of work! saya rasa kesibukan dan teman-teman sudah lebih dari cukup untuk mengalihkan diri dari kesedihan akibat single selama 4 tahun.
Nothing’s wrong with being single. tapi saya akui..it get worst at night. pernah nggak, terbangun tengah malam, dengan perasaan galau segalau-galaunya? saya nggak mau jadi temen kurang ajar yang dengan seenaknya nelpon temen-temen saya tengah malam cuma buat ngilangin galau (meski saya tau mereka gak akan keberatan). saya butuh, orang yang siap saya hubungin kapan aja kalau saya galau.
Egois memang, pengen punya pacar cuma buat ngapusin galau. tapi memang itu yang saya butuhkan sekarang. orang yang gak akan marah kalau tiba-tiba saya telpon, saya ajak pergi ngalor ngidul jauh. orang yang siap pegang tangan saya, peluk saya kalau saya kalut.
Dan juga, orang yang siap jadi second wheel, karena saya rasa its enough being a third wheel..
(Source: adviceforallmychildren)
There is no person in the world who is made to handle every punch that’s thrown at them. We aren’t made that way. In fact, we’re made to get mad, upset, sad, be hurt, stumble, and fall. We weren’t supposed to be able to handle everything, but that’s what makes us stronger in the end, by learning from the things that hurt us the most.
(via coffeetablebooks)
Being good to people, work as hard as I can, being available if anybody needs help, studying abroad..it’s all for what? So at least there’s gonna be someone who say “you did good. Good enough” to me.
Apparently, it’s never gonna be good enough.
Sometimes, I just need to have someone who have faith in me, who believe that I’m good enough, to make me believe in my self..
“Sebaik-baiknya orang adalah orang yang bisa memberi manfaat bagi orang lain”
Reasons why I love ‘How I Met Your Mother’
I followed this series since about 2 years ago, but never really ‘followed’ it, until now when i have all the dvds from all season. Well I like it because it’s funny, it has twist ending, a better story than other series and….it reminds me so much to a friendship I used to have.
I used to see myself as Ted Mosby, the main character of the story. I always picture myself, telling the story to my kids about how i met their father..and so on and so on..just like Ted did.
What I learned from this series is..the story of how we met our, you know, ‘the one’ its not all about the love story. Its a build up of ‘how i met my friends’, and then ‘how my friends introduce me to this guy’, ‘how my friends get married first before me’, and etc.
The point is..when I have kids, I’ll tell them about how I met their father. Im not just gonna tell them how we met, Im gonna tell the all whole story. I’m gonna tell them how i met my best friends, one by one, all of you guys, with every single detail. You guys gonna be the part of the most important things im going to tell my childrens later.
And so that’s why i love this series. I mean, my friendships is broken..and the least I can do to picture it perfect is by seeing it on a movie. though its only a movie, for me..it still real.
“So kids, thats how I met my friend…and that’s how we decided not to be friends again. i hope you kids learn a lot from my mistakes.” -that’s what Im going to tell my kids. :)
Personal Joke :))
“I think for the most part if you’re really honest with yourself about what you want out of life, life gives it to you”
- Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother
be who you are and say what you want because those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter
In my life, I’ve never seen a happy couple. Every one seems to finally come to an end, either cheat or being cheated on. Terlalu banyak gue ngelyat suami istri yang divorce karena selingkuh, atau simply karena “udah gak satu prinsip lagi”. And I think, “what the hell? Klo emang gak satu visi kenapa nikah? Klo emang bakal bosen kenapa nikah?kenapa harus selingkuh?” And then I lost my faith in marriage, especially, and in couples, generally. I’ve been thinking “to hell with marriage. I’m okey with my self. Being in a relationship sucks. I do believe in love, but I don’t believe in commitment.” . Until I knew you and your partner. Everything seems impossible, but you made it thru. You made it last for years. For the first time in my life, I see loves struggling trough boundaries. I, finally find my faith in relationship again. Because of you two. But then this happen. You know, I never thought it’d be like this. I thought you could last for years, have a long happy life, with everything you’ve been struggling with. But its not. Because of what? Society. Its sucks, you know.
Whoever feel sad or frustrated about being gay should read this :)
Neil Patrick Harris: “I remember being in my mid-twenties, lying in bed thinking, I’ve never taken a shower with anyone before; I’ve never had any kind of long-term relationship. I remember thinking that the rest of my life would be solo. I wasn’t weepy when I thought that — it was just a realization that I had gone this long being self-sufficient. I’d also like to call him my husband. I’m not the biggest fan of the word “partner”: It either means that we run a business together or we’re cowboys. “Boyfriend” seems fleeting, like maybe we met two weeks ago. I’ve been saying “better half” for as long as I’ve been able to. I think it’s a little self-deprecating and clearly defines that we’re in a relationship, but it would be nice to say “my husband.””
David Burtka: “We are, in a way, very codependent. He’s my lifeline, in an amazing way. Without him, I can’t breathe. The biggest thing is that he makes me laugh, but he’s also smart. He can do everything. I’m not kidding; I think he’s half robot. He makes me a little more grounded, and I bring out the wild side in him. Don’t get me wrong — we fight. Our fights last five minutes, then we’re over it. And we’re both Gemini — we have a good twin and a bad twin, and the four of us get along really well! I don’t want people to think we’re a perfect couple. Nothing’s perfect. A relationship is work and it changes. And you go with the changes. It’s more good times than bad times, but it’s not always good. You have to overcome those issues and move on. We have a really great recipe for a wonderful relationship, but we don’t want to be the poster boys for gay relationships. We’re not trying to pretend that we are perfect. We’re just trying — in a good, positive, loving way — to live our lives.”
Mungkin persahabatan yang terpaksa usai itu seperti keperawanan yang hilang diperkosa. Semuanya tidak akan pernah sama, meskipun seandainya nanti jemari akan bertaut lagi.
(via leilockheart)
life is what happens to you when you’re busy making other plans
Photo Courtesy: me0wmaid
